Energy is a funny thing. In addition to our own internal thoughts and beliefs, life happens and the external world has an enormous impact on how we feel energetically. Think for a moment about the last time you were in a tense environment. You could probably sense the energy in the room. In fact, this is why people sometimes say “you can cut the tension with a knife!” For an empath, that type of energy can penetrate their personal force field and have a draining impact on how they feel.

The good news is, we get to choose in every moment how we’re going to give or receive energy. In order to make the best choices for ourselves, we get to explore a few relevant topics. Take a few minutes to answer the following questions:

• What do you value?

• What is it that you need (in life, in relationship, at work, etc)?

• What are your limits?

• What are the things that push you over the edge?

• What basic actions can you perform on a daily basis to ensure you’re continuously recharging?

• What are you willing to give up in order to protect your energy?

Understanding your answers to these questions will help you define your boundaries. You see, boundaries are the key to protecting your energy. Setting and enforcing healthy boundaries can create a feeling of empowerment. I see them as a form of self care. Consider, for a moment, how often you put yourself on the back-burner. Personally, I’ve been guilty of putting my career ahead of self care and relationships in the past. I used to commute one and a half hours each way to my office in Manhattan and I worked really long hours. By the time I’d get home from work, I was starving, cranky and exhausted, and couldn’t fathom going to the gym or hanging out with friends. It took a few burn-out moments to finally realize how important it was to make myself a priority. The second I started to view my train rides into the city as “me time” instead of more time to answer work emails, my energy completely shifted. Listening to upbeat podcasts, reading interesting books, and intentionally catching up with friends over text created so much more enjoyment in my life. My point here is that there’s nothing selfish about putting yourself first or establishing regular self care practices in order to protect your energy.

Make yourself a priority! Establishing healthy boundaries creates a deep sense of self-compassion and kindness toward yourself. And guess what?! When you respect yourself, your time and your energy, you’ll find that other’s will do the same. Give yourself permission to recharge when you need to. This will only improve your ability to take care of others and it will create space for a more efficient output at work. Now, take a few moments to determine what “recharging” looks like to you. For me, it typically looks like getting 8-9 hours of sleep, spending quality time with myself listening to music or in nature, doing yoga and meditation, or eating whole, nutrient-dense foods.

Another extremely important thing to consider is setting boundaries when working from home. For anyone who has continued to work remotely since the start of the pandemic, it’s crucial to establish your limits and ensure balance in your life. Make a schedule for yourself to include “office hours” and personal time. When office hours are up, put your work away to focus on your personal life. It can be easy to blur the lines between the two areas until you get clear on your needs. Set your limits and don’t neglect your emotional or physical health.

Below Are The 4 Steps To Setting Healthy Boundaries:

• DEFINE YOUR BOUNDARY: This means identifying your limits. If you followed the earlier prompts, you likely came up with a few limits across several areas of your life, possibly including career, relationships, social life, diet, etc. Use those to complete the exercise.

• COMMUNICATE YOUR NEEDS: Clearly communicate your boundaries along with why they’re important to you. Try using the following statement to help with this —> I feel _________ when _________ because _________. What I need is _________. This can support you in expressing yourself freely.

• BE DIRECT AND ASSERTIVE: Say what you mean in an authentic and direct manner. Saying “no” is healthy when you mean it. There is no need to feel guilty and you certainly don’t need to explain why. A simple and direct no answer will suffice. Rather than concerning yourself with how others feel, be confident in doing what feels right to you.

• SET STEADFAST CONSEQUENCES: Choose consequences that you’re willing to follow through on and stick to them. Your needs are as important as everyone else’s. If someone doesn’t understand or respect that, then it’s important that you respect yourself by sticking to your word.

As always, I would suggest checking in with yourself periodically to determine if your needs have changed. As your personal and emotional needs evolve, keep the lines of communication open and remember to be clear and steadfast about what you need in order to protect your energy. Feel free to reference my earlier blog post, entitled ‘Self Care Who?’ to further support your needs. In the meantime, what’s one new boundary you can set straight away to create more well-being in your life? Write it in the comment section and let me know how it goes!