Be. Do. Have. & Be Joyful
“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”
I remember my SoulCycle instructor once talked about a friend who was grieving the loss of a loved one and she was desperately trying to get back to that feeling of joy that might get her out of bed each day. So she created this hashtag, #chasingjoy and she was on a mission to DO things in search of that feeling. I was inspired by hearing that story, because it dawned on me in that moment that I hadn’t felt pure joy in quite some time. I too yearned for that feeling that would get me excited about every new day. For the next few weeks, I decided I would try to DO more things that made me feel joy - like spending time in nature, listening to music, kicking ass on the SoulCycle bike, hanging out with my niece and nephews, and shopping. What I discovered, however, was that doing these things only gave me a quick fix and the feeling was temporary. I was still feeling overwhelmed by the exhaustion of my lengthy commute to work, frustrated by my job and the wacky personalities I had to deal with, and irritated every time I had to squeeze onto a crowded E train at the end of the day.
Then I started getting acupuncture and my energy completely shifted. I was finding that even though I hated my line of work, the things that used to annoy me no longer did. I started listening to music and podcasts during my lengthy commute and I’d smile at the person standing next to me on the crowded train. Overall, I was feeling more at peace with my situation, but I still had my moments and then zen-ness would come and go. My acupuncturist suggested I take a leadership training, and at first I thought he was crazy. But then I was intrigued because I trusted his judgement. If he felt it would be good for me, then it probably was. Month’s later, right after I was laid off from my job due to cutbacks, I started the third part of the training, which lasted for a whole 90 days. This is where I heard about the Be Do Haves for the first time. I’m not going to lie, in the beginning I was annoyed that I had to take on the task of sharing my Be Do Have’s by 9am every morning. I’m not a morning person and I really enjoy my sleep, but once I got into the swing of things, I realized what had been missing for me all this time. Funny enough, IIN also reinforced the benefit of the Be Do Have exercise and given its effectiveness in my life, I’m going to share the wealth with you.
You see, it’s not the act of DOING that creates joy in your life. The more authentic way of creating joy is through your way of being. When you can bring things like joy or gratitude to the things you do, you begin to approach life more intentionally and create space for you to actually have that feeling. So allow me to share this simple exercise, in which you can decide who you get to BE in order to create joy in your life, no matter what your circumstance.
Ask yourself, who must I BE to inform what must I DO so that I can HAVE the results I want? For more specifics on how to complete Be Do Have exercise, see below:
Create three separate columns with the headers “Be,” “Do” and “Have”.
BE —> Who do you get to be in order to achieve your goals? Some examples could include joyful, grateful, loving, connected, present, mindful, rigorous, playful or curious. Try listing at least 3 adjectives under this column.
DO —> You’re way of being sets you forth in action. Once you align yourself with who you’re committed to being, consider the action steps you will take. These should always align with and keep you on track with achieving your overall goals. Ensure this list is clear, concise and actionable.
HAVE —> Lastly, identify the results your ways of being and actions will bring you. In some cases, they may relate to you’re ways of being. For instance, if you’re being connected, the results you get may include presence and connection. Again, try listing at least three things here.
Practice this exercise for 90 days and not only will this help shift your mind set, but in doing so, I believe you’ll achieve more optimal results. Ultimately, the things you attract/receive are based on the energy you give. Personally, I choose to create joy by being joyful with everything I do. I hope you’ll use this practice in an intentional way to create joy in your life as well!
